Friday, March 29, 2013

The Best of the Worst Blog Spam

Nearly every day, this humble blog receives at least one comment from someone who wishes to remain Anonymous. Usually, the comments have nothing to do with a post I've written. They are what's known as blog spam, intended to direct traffic to dubious websites. 

The vast majority are written in cracked English. And while I find spam comments individually annoying, collectively they could form a slim volume of hallucinogenic haiku poetry. Here are some of the best of the worst blog spam comments I've removed from my blog in recent months. The first two are ridiculous; the last one, outrageous. 

In response to my post on A Piggly Wiggly piggy bank, a pie bird, and other Southern essentials: "One is designed to prevent herpes infection, and the other to treat herpes, so those are promising projects. capitalists would, and he wrote that "the two value model presented here most resembles Eysenck's hypothesis. Job interviews serve the purpose of the employer and the potential employee meeting for a face-to-face interaction, with the employer getting a chance to assess first hand the suitability of the candidate for the position."

A comment left for my post Why I love Tennessee Williams' stage directions -- and Elizabeth Taylor, too: "This is a powerful, biological urge. Put on a happy face. Applying a penis vitamin cream (most health professionals recommend Man 1 Man Oil) can help to ensure that the area has an ongoing supply of skin-rejuvenating, disease-fighting and sensation-enhancing nutrients to keep it looking and feeling healthy and sexy."

And finally, this one is my favorite. It's a comment left for my post Is Southern Hospitality a Myth? "Ground cover can be added to pedophile the landscape. And your shoes will not be tracking soil into the house. This same person spread several yards of the mulch around their house before they realized the problem, and it ruined many of their plants."


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13 comments:

  1. Pedophiles and penis creams. Your spam is much more interesting than mine...

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    1. Judi, I shudder to think what might happen if the pedophile gets the penis cream! Jim

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  2. I just ranted about this very thing! Most of them start out complimenting the heck out of your blog and then launch into the bizarre, completely unrelated JUNK, along with a link to their stupid websites. It just started--I know other bloggers have had the problem for awhile and had to enable comment moderation and word verification, which is annoying for those of us who just want to comment on a post we like. Oh well, such is the wonderful world of blogging. BTW, I'm a San Franciscan/Bay Arean (?) in the South, southern Mississippi to be precise. I will NEVER get used to it!

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    1. Southern Mississippi? Wow, you really did go Deep South! But I bet that gives you lots of blog material, right?

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  3. I know that spam must be boring for you but it is funny to read about that!!
    Here in brazil, spam is an epidemic but often is about a bank that you are not a client sending you a loan proposal rsrsrs :)

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  4. Well, I guess it isn't all bad then that I haven't got a big audience and hardly ever get any spam :)

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    1. Oh, but give it time, and I bet you will!

      Delete
  5. hahaha at the last spam you posted.. and the spam that commented on the spam post.

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    1. I know -- and I thought it was hilarious that this post got spam, too. That's why I decided to leave it instead of deleting it.

      Delete
  6. Great post, thanks for this post.....

    Trak

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    1. Glad you liked it, John. Thanks for your comment. Jim

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